So, l finally got a credit card the other day and I activated it today. I'm so excited! I was thinking of getting a Mac computer, but I'm going to hold that off for a while longer, until after my move to California. I need to use it wisely and think about building my credit. I also have a checkbook now and three accounts, which is good. Still working at the slave trade called Wal-Mart, but I'm saving the majority of my paychecks and only buying what I need to. I will have to transfer my savings and checking to another bank though, but I will, as a back up plan, leave some money in my old bank.

This is my plan:
I move to California somewhere in January. Burbank, here I come, where I'll be looking around for an apartment and a job, my parents will be helping me out during this time. I'll also go to Los Angeles, Santa Monica, and so on. Within six months to a year I will know if I'll be able to get a job or not. If I do not find a job within a year, (and I'm not saying I won't) I'll go back home and establish a small production company with the remaining money I have left. Hopefully, I will get a job and start saving up all over again and then I'll go back to California to try a second time.

I'm also looking into health care, since I have none. I'm looking into Blue Shield Blue Cross; so far, I hear they are the best and I'm thinking that I'll go with them. I'm looking into two plans, which aren't bad compared to what I was paying before which was $300 per month. There is a $150 plan and a $178 plan, which basically pays the basic like dental, blood tests, prescriptions, doctor visits and so on. My dad said he'll help me pay half and I'll pay the rest, also I might need a new cell phone plan, so I might be thinking about getting a Blackberry... but we'll see about that one because they're pretty expensive at the moment. My sister in New York says it would be good to have a Blackberry just in case and offered to even pay one for me, but I told not to worry. She may give me some money on my birthday, but I'll probably use that money to save up on Final Cut Pro, since that program is like $1000 or more.

Work is going alright, I'm working 7 p.m. to 12 a.m. today, which is odd... I haven't seen Rachel in months now since I work mornings. I don't worry about her anymore and I haven't had any major problems lately. I somewhat feel like everything is going in the right direction now and I don't seem that depressed. I'm making a lot of friends at Wal-Mart, but I don't want to get too comfortable there. Everyone keeps calling me the next Steven Spielberg, which is really weird, because I don't tell them everything, except I just want to be a film director. I don't go around bragging I'm going to be the next Steven Spielberg or the next Steven King and so on... but somehow everyone seems to know so much about me. I'm kind of happy that so many people support me and yet I wonder where they're getting their information from. Anyway, Tom keeps rooting for me to finish my novel. He told me many times not to rush it and not to be easily fooled by sneaky book publishers, who might scam me. He said to me "if you spend eight years trying to write, don't just give it away for 500 bucks." He said my work deserves more than that like $1 million or something LOL XP he's so funny.

Oh yeah, kanye West and Taylor Swift... come on kanye West, that was just so rude. To say that when she won her first award, even if it is country music, let the girl enjoy her moment. I don't think I will be listening to any of his music anymore, kanye West, you need some counseling. Actually, you need God! If your mother was still alive, what would she do if she saw you dissing a 19-year-old, who never did a thing towards you? I have never heard of Taylor Swift in my life, but she sure didn't deserve that kind of treatment. Thank God for Beyoncé. Beyoncé was kind enough to give that girl some love and to finish her speech. You can't bully your way to stardom and I hope kanye West, you learn the hard way. Stop coming up with excuses for your bad behavior. It's not right.

Now, that I got that off my shoulders. The writing is going pretty good. Slow but very good and I'm trying to write locations for the scenes in the novel, but sometimes I feel that I'm repeating myself and that I'm not really describing much of the scene but just the situation in which the main character finds himself. Anyway, I've got four more to finish and then after that I've got three interrogation scenes, including another scene where Zander is talking to Rue... but it's not the ending scene it's more of a beginning scene, like the beginning of the end. I still haven't figured out how I'm going to end this first novel, whether it's a discovery or not, it's still in the works. But once I do finish the 66 pages I have left, I'll finally look into revisions.

Anime Honeybee help me out greatly with her suggestions, so I'm going to print them out and start looking at them. I should probably do some exercising, but I'm just too tired right now. I know I go to work later on but I don't feel like doing anything that's going to exhaust me even further, but I'll probably do some early walking maybe tomorrow or so, I still need to lose some weight. I've been doing pretty good, but I had to drop out of a weight competition because it was just too stressful and the suspense was killing me. If I gained 1 pound it was just dramatic for me. Anyway, I have to make a habit of drinking water every day since I've been slacking a bit. In other news, I finished reading some of the books I borrowed at the library and I'm thinking of buying "The Secret Life of Bees" or even buying the movie, since I love the movie and the book.

So, Luis came by today to pick up his shirt...the one he left the last month or two. It would've been nice to see just Luis, but Chris happened to be there and the whole thing was just awkward. The last time I talked to Luis he said that he and Chris were breaking up, since Chris hurt him really badly. Not only that but Chris is so much older than Luis; the guy is in his late 40s almost 50 years old and Luis is only 24 or 23 years old. I just don't understand why Luis is not listening to his friends, who have repeatedly told him to find someone else because Chris is selfish and does not want to be in a committed relationship.

How can you change an old man who is stubborn in his ways? Chris will always be looking for someone else regardless of what happens, unless he's 80 years old and then that's just sad... really really sad. If he is almost 50 and he can't find someone to spend the rest of his life, then something is wrong here. But Luis seems to be manipulated by him and there is nothing I can do. I support Luis regardless, but I will not support Chris, I will still be respectful and polite to him... but I don't like the treatment of Luis as if he's a puppet on strings.

I feel very much alone now, I'm still going to California in January no matter what happens. No one is going to stop me, but with my parents' help I will be looking for an apartment, paying rent, and actually living in California after January. I will be looking for a job constantly and I know how things may be rough, but my older sister called me the other day and said she would support me in my time of need. We had a slight argument because I had said something that I might be living off the street, but I didn't mean it literally and she took it the wrong way.

But when she said that she would help me pay rent and all that it made me think that she does really love me and the only people who I can trust is family. Because the truth is when friends, especially close friends and relatives turn their backs on me, the only ones I can trust now is my mother and my sister. My dad might help me out for a bit, but as he gets older he seems to be more angry, even when I was a baby, he feels his life has been wasted, which is odd cause he's supposed to be my father. We argue so much it just gives me more of a reason to move out and never see him again.

It will be wonderful to be living on my own, my mom might stay with me for a few weeks more, but I'm thinking that one month will be good enough because I don't want her to be so involved in my life. I just don't want her to be a distraction, but we'll see how it goes. More than ever I want freedom and to live the life that I've always wanted to live, without any regrets. I want a honest and decent life, where someone is not telling me 100% of the time what to do with my life. I'll be able to write whatever I want without having to think about how my parents are going to feel about it, without having to worry about how anyone feels... My writing is my own, my thoughts are my own, and I don't care what anyone else thinks or says about me expressing myself.

I haven't spoken to my online sister in almost 4 months now... I spoke to her somewhere in June, I just hope that she's doing all right. I'm thinking I might upload some pictures that my mom took in the garden, she took over 200 something pictures since I let her borrow my camera. It's a simple camera and she seems to be having fun with it because she's never used a camera before and so she's learning more about it every day, which is good. I hope someday she'll be able to learn how to use the computer one day without someone there all the time to show her everything. I've been writing a little here and there, I finished writing down scenes for the sequel and now I'm just trying to revise my first novel.

I've just been mostly doing hand-written notes, but it feels good to know where my story is going. I've got just 94 or 96 pages left to finish in my notebook, and then I can start adding those chapters and revising them. I want to have like 300 or 400 pages for the first book, since it was kind of short, only 200 pages. I've been borrowing books from the library and reading more, I think I feel confident to keep going forward. I have added a new twist, and a more complex storyline that might end up being really interesting. Other than that, everything is going fine.